Friday, August 20, 2010

I hate it every time

Six times I've had to do it, and it never gets easier. It's one of the things I dread as a parent. 

Today, I had to explain to my five-year-old son what abortion is. 

Every kid has the same reaction. Disbelief, confusion, denial, horror.

How could anyone do that? Who doesn't love little babies? Who forces a mom to do that? How could a mom ever do that to her baby?

It's the worst conversation I ever have to have. I feel like I'm taking their innocence by telling them the terrible truth of it.

And kids really get the evil of it. You don't have to paint a picture (I never, ever get graphic, and I use only the simplest terms). Children are naturally pro-life. The idea of someone killing a child in his mother's womb is so foreign to small children as to be absurd, nonsensical, insane. As it should be.

I wish we all could have the clarity and innocence of little children, and that the whole world could be repelled by the thought of abortion.




  1. I remember explaining what abortion was to a class of sixth graders. They were disgusted.

    It was a tough question to answer, but hopefully none of them ever have to deal with it themselves.

    God willing.

  2. I have had the convo with my oldest. She was 6 at the time. It was heart-wrenching to watch her tears and try to explain the unexplainable.

  3. So awful to have to explain that, I am sure - bless your heart. How did it come up in conversation?

  4. How awful. I had to explain it to my 9 year old little charge when it was election time - when she said she didn't CARE who her mom voted for (her mom voted for the good guy.) She was shocked, and it was really sad. I can't imagine telling M. I would SO rather have the sex talk. Actually our sex talk is going to be ongoing until she gets married. ;)

  5. What a sad conversation to have to have! I'm so sorry that you've had to do it six times.

  6. I know exactly what you mean, but have you noticed that when you have that talk with them, after the initial confusion and horror, they suddenly become far more appreciative of their Faith? All of mine did that, after that talk. Every one. Leila, you know how people accuse faithful Catholics of being arrogant know-it-alls. It's not that we know so much. It's just that the few things we do know, we know with absolute certainty and it gives us tremendous peace, freedom, strength and confidence. After the "abortion talk", I've found that the kids do get that peace, freedom, strength and confidence in knowing that they are blessed in knowing the truth and being spared such evil. So, even though it's not a pleasant talk to have, it's an important one and one that bears fruit.

  7. I remember when I found out...I still can feel the horror...

    Love how you said kids are naturally pro-life. Excellent.

  8. I hated having that conversation with Mikey too. He was about 5 as well. I had to choke back tears during it and he just sat and stared, then got very sad and put his head down. I didn't even REALLY explain it! He just knew. Then he asked if women HAD to get abortions, and if I had considered it with him. Oh my gosh, so horrible! Their little minds go to the worst places. I'll pray for your little one and you too.

  9. So...I'm wondering how this came up so I'll be prepared:) Was this in a school/catechism lesson about the 10 Commandments? Or did your child come to you and ask. How did you explain it?

    I have not had to field any major questions yet but never know if it's best to tell the facts plainly or doctor it up so it's not so horrifying/embarassing/shocking, whatever. Moslty I am thinking of things like the differences between little boys and girls but now you have me thinking deeper!

  10. Gosh I never thought this--having to explain that to a child. How awful. :( It is true how you said children are naturally pro-life and have a "clarity" to the black-and-white truth instead of the confusion and "gray" areas.

  11. It came up when a classmate in his Kindergarten (great Catholic school) said something about it. Then later, my son asked me.

    I actually like the way it happened (and it usually happens like that in my circles, since many of the families pray at abortion mills and such, so young kids are aware), because it takes the pressure off of me to decide when to bring it up.

    I am glad it is over with, so that part is good.

    It's easy to teach a child to be pro-life (since they are naturally and instinctively pro-life). The real mind-boggler is those who teach their children that a mother has a right to kill her child in the womb. My mom said to me years ago... "How does a mother teach her child to be 'pro-choice'?" It's really unimaginable.

  12. Oh, your poor child! What a hard thing to have to hear...
    I don't remember how old I was when I first learned what abortion was, but I do remember being so utterly horrified that such a thing existed.

  13. Ugh. Awful. It's so sad to see their innocence slip away as they learn the terrible truths about our society. :( I already get sad when I see Avery get her feelings hurt by another child or feeling disappointed by something. I can't even imagine having this conversation yet... :(

  14. You are completely and totally right. Children understand things far better than we do as adults. Was it the 19th century? When hey believed that children were closer to God because it hadn't been so long since they had been with Him?

  15. I was talking to a 4th grade class once about the casualities of war and one boy said "Abortion kills more people than war." I was stunned to silence...he's right. Ugh!

    Glad you saw the positives with the conversation with your child. As young as he is...and not knowing how children are conceived...he knows abortion is wrong..inately.

    Do you really think there are parents out there who openly tell their young (5, 6, 7 or 8 years old)daughters they have a right to choose life because it's their body or do you think that conversation happens when there's a baby on the way? Hmmmm....I'm not all that sure a young girl/child would get that. Honestly.hmmmm.... If's not appropriate.

  16. Prayerfuljourney, yes, I know that feminist moms teach their children the pro-abortion position at a young age. Even today I read another blogger who told of her mother teaching her how to debate the "pro-choice" side at age 9! Sad, isn't it?

    That fourth grade boy, wow! Bless his soul, and the parents who taught him the truth well.

  17. Leila - I remember when my oldest nephew learned about it. He was pretty little still. My sister would pray for women and babies and he wanted to know why. Poor little guy really was horrified and started praying with his mom. He couldn't fathom why a mommy wouldn't save her own baby.


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