Be back soon....

Well, a blogger has to take a vacation every now and then, right? What am I going to do without you guys, though? Please, no interesting or controversial posts while I am gone, all right? Thanks, I appreciate it! I really don't want to miss anything. I will try to check in when I can.

And, maybe this is a good time to leave, since Blogger is having a huge glitch with retaining and displaying blog comments. They said they are working on it. It better be fixed by the time I get back, or else, ha ha! (I am sure they are shaking in their boots.)  


Bye for now!!

Your periods, your way.

Ewwwww!

So a couple of days ago, I am at my gynecologist's office (which is always a great time), and I am sitting alone on the crinkly paper, in a paper robe (sorry you had to read that; do you think I liked writing it?), and I'm looking around because of course there is nothing else to do but look around. 

Covering the stirrups (yuck, hate that word) are the little yellow stirrup warmers advertising the Pill (oh, joy!). I am used to those (even though I never get used to those). 

Then, I glance at the poster on the back of the door, and here's what jumped out at me:

YOUR PERIODS.  YOUR WAY.

You want:      You'll get:

                              

Underneath the first column were the three options a woman might "want": 0 periods a year, 4 periods a year, 13 periods a year. And the "you'll get" part went on to describe what type of Pill and how it would be prescribed.

I thought, Now, there's our culture in a nutshell: You want it, you'll get it! Your way! Periods served up just like Burger King! Yeeeee-haw!

It's been said that the theme song in Hell is I Did it My Way. If you've ever listened to the lyrics, you'll agree that must be the case. And by golly I couldn't help it, I started singing that tune in my head until the doctor came in! 

Now, I love my doctor. He is an incredible evangelical Christian, and one of the few OB/gyns in town who is vocally pro-life. In one examining room he had even hung a beautiful defense of the humanity of the human embryo. But, ironically, he has contraception ads all over the darned place. This particular poster was the most remarkable I have seen.

You gotta wonder, what is so wrong with a woman's body that we must chemically alter its functioning, stopping what it was designed -- by God -- to do? When did the suppression/derailing of a normal bodily process become "health," and when did we decide it was good to advertise it, convincing women to ask for something we never knew we wanted? And when did it become all about "me" and what I "want" anyway?

And the worst part of all for me personally? It's knowing that a few years ago, I would have thought this product was the greatest thing since sliced bread.

Like I said, Ewwwww!

And Lord have mercy.

I was a boy once, too! *UPDATED*

So, you all had a good laugh over Ann's post about when she was a boy, eh? Then this should make you fall off your seats! Yes, that is me at 4 years old, in my preschool picture (circa 1971). Proof, for sure, that I was once a boy! The son my dad never had. Nice hair, don't you think? I'm glad that I was later able to get in touch with my feminine side. (By the way... that boy shirt? It's actually a dress.)

*Update: I just showed this post to my fifteen-year-old daughter. She asked me, "Is that Dad?" When I told her who it was, she cracked up and said, "You look like a boy!" Exactly.

A couple quick things...

(So sorry to interrupt the riveting discussion about toilet paper on the previous post. Feel free to keep commenting on that post, though, because can toilet paper really ever be discussed enough?)

First, I am SO EXCITED to be a part of the Prayer Buddies this time around! And, I couldn't be more thrilled about the person I am praying for! I hope I will do right by you, Prayer Buddy! Yippee!!! Thanks JBTC, TCIE and Sew for organizing this impressive effort!

Second, is it really tacky to become an "Amazon Associate" or whatever they call it? Meaning, a blogger signs up with Amazon to receive 15% of any purchase made through a recommendation on the blog? I have linked books to Amazon in the past, and I will be linking to books in the future, so why not bring in a couple of bucks if someone chooses to buy it from Amazon through my blog? It would make my husband think my blog was productive, ha! But is the whole idea tacky?? Tell me what you think and be honest!

Oh, and for anyone who is still dragging her feet on her faith story, consider this my gentle prompting.

Sorry, Sew, this is another boring post, but I will do better next time and stir up some controversy for you, I promise! ;)

3 Quick Pet Peeves: Remotes, misrepresentation, and toilet paper

1. I really don't understand why I have eight remote controls for three TVs? Shouldn't technology simplify things?? And, since I don't know how to use most of the features on the remotes or the TVs, the whole situation becomes even more absurd.

2. It troubles me when people misrepresent the Catholic Faith after they have been informed that they are wrong about Catholic teaching. I mean, if I tell you (and even show you) that my home is painted blue, and yet you continue to tell me that my home is painted yellow, then we can't even talk about house paint can we? I get it that you may not like blue, but that still won't make my house yellow!

3. It's an old argument I know, but the toilet paper should come up over the top of the roll, and no one should ever have to reach up from the bottom near the wall and pull it down that way. All of you bottom pullers can try to defend your position, but deep in your hearts you know you are wrong.

And that's as controversial as I will get today, ha ha!! (But I feel some more controversy coming up soon, so stay tuned...)

Butterflies! *UPDATED* (twice!)

Ann, see, I promised you butterflies! But, I think this specimen is technically a moth? I am not sure. I am not a lepidopterist (yes, I had to look that up).

Anyway, we found this little dude last summer perched on the porch bench of my parents' cabin up in the White Mountains of Arizona. We were all pretty freaked out by it, because it was looking at us, with two sets of "eyes"! Anyone know anything about this particular creature?
*Update: Many thanks to Jenny, who has determined, after a detailed probe, that our specimen is, in fact, a MOTH.

*Second Update: Jenny has a sneaky hubby with a bug book who posted under an assumed name. Read Jenny's comment for further details.

Why I can't talk to liberals, even though I've tried

In my last post, I told you I could write a whole post on the times I have tried to have an honest, formal dialogue with a liberal. I am going to lay out my experiences for you here, and maybe it will make sense to someone.

As you all know by now (because I repeat it endlessly), I like clarity. For this reason, I have tried on three occasions over the past two years to have fruitful exchanges with self-professed modern-day liberals. All with the same result.

Here are the terms I proposed to each of the gentlemen before we began: I told them that I was not trying to convert them to my way of thinking (I knew that was unlikely with these particular men), but that I was truly, sincerely trying to understand the liberal mindset. I find no logic in modern liberalism, and I admit that it drives me crazy. I actually spend time wracking my brain, trying to understand.

(Small aside here, for context: When I took the GMATs for graduate school admissions, I scored in the 99th percentile nationally in the logic section. I mention that not to brag, because who really cares, but so that you might understand how my mind works and why I must have things make sense! It's in my DNA, I guess.)

I love social and political commentator Dennis Prager (a Jewish conservative), who always makes the point: "I prefer clarity to agreement." Me, too. I assured these liberals that I didn't need them to agree with me. I only wanted to have clarity about what they believe.

I told them I wanted to ask them one question at a time, about things that I really, truly didn't get. If they could answer me as honestly and clearly as possible, I would appreciate it. I told them that I had had no luck getting any clear answers from liberals before. They would be the first.

First far-left guy I approached via email was a university professor (what else), teaching political science and law (of course). A friend of my husband from dh's days as a Democrat. He agreed to my ground rules, but, after I proposed that we start with the issue of abortion, he warns me that I won't like what he has to say (he is so far left that he has no problem with partial-birth abortion).

No problem, I said, and we're ready to go! I shot him an email with my first question:

"When I was homeschooling my sixth-grade daughter a few years ago, her secular Harcourt science book began its chapter on human biology with the following sentence: 'You began life as a single cell.' Do you agree with that statement?"

He never answered. Oh, he did write back once or twice after my promptings, saying he was busy working on the Obama campaign, but would definitely get back to me. I reminded him that it was a yes or no question, and that if he just answered yes or no, we could move on or pick up later, after the election. I never heard from him again.

Second far-left guy was a law student (what else) atheist (of course), son of friends. He agreed to all the same terms, we had a friendly exchange about our backgrounds, and then I emailed him my first question:

"I keep hearing liberals in the media and elsewhere say that conservatives today are increasingly radical, and that we keep moving further and further to the right on issues. Can you tell me on what specific issues conservatives keep moving significantly to the right?"

I never heard from him again. I emailed him a couple of times, and I never received a response. (Was that a difficult or offensive question?)

Third far-left guy. An old, dear friend from college who had "come out" some years later (it was no surprise). A great guy, and when we met up again on facebook, we had a very positive and honest conversation about our differences. He seemed excited about the dialogue I proposed, chose the topic himself ("gay marriage"), and I then sent him my first message of the dialogue. You can read it here, in my previous blog post. He answered me with excitement and said that he liked where this was going. And yet, I never heard from him again.

Fast forward to now. After my last blog post, I was pleased to see that a liberal reader, Gwen, commented. She addressed several issues, but not the specific question I posed about manipulation of language. When I asked her again, in the comments section, she again did not answer the question directly. I also asked Gwen another direct question twice (a yes or no question) and still, no answer.

I admit to frustration. I don't get it. I am not asking her, or any liberal, to agree with my conservative positions. But I wonder why I can't get any answers to simple questions? For example, maybe the first guy doesn't believe that he began life as a single cell. Maybe he disagrees with the science book. Fine. I don't care. I just want to be clear that that is indeed his position. At least then his rabidly pro-abort position makes more sense to me, and we can have clarity on that issue and move forward in understanding each other.

Same with the question of language manipulation. Perhaps some people think it's okay to change the definitions of words in order to promote a political agenda. Okay. I accept that. Just be honest, and then at least I'll know where you stand. Again, we can have clarity then, and move forward.

It would bring so much comfort to my crazy little logic-loving brain if an honest liberal could just answer my questions instead of ignoring them or dancing around them. Anyone?

**Disclaimer for Ann: I promise, on my honor, that my next post will be about something light and non-controversial, like rainbows, butterflies, or bubbles. Maybe little Catholic bubbles.

(Also, my recent IVF post was reprinted at Catholic Exchange.)

While we're at it....

Why not add some more controversy to my blog?

The overhyped and over-the-top "Gay Pride 40th Anniversary" celebrations are hard to avoid, and I'm getting the media's point that we are to feel ashamed if we do not "celebrate" the joys of homosexuality with the other enlightened ones.

Yahoo even had a caption on one of its news photos of the event which read, Yahoo! is proud to support the LGBT community and wishes all a Happy 40th Gay Pride!

Um...was that shout-out really necessary?

Anyway, all this talk of "gay pride" reminded me that a few months back, a gay friend of mine from college agreed to debate me on the (admittedly limited) topic of "gay marriage." Here's what I wrote him to kick it off:

Okay, so here is my basic problem when debating the topic of "gay marriage":

I have an issue with the whole premise of redefining language. If a word means something, then redefining it seems to me a manipulation. For example, if the whole of the English speaking world has understood the meaning of the word "chair" to mean "chair" then I think it is wrong that a small group could start insisting that we understand "chair" to mean "chair and table". It distorts language and clouds understanding, till words become meaningless.

In my mind, the same thing happened with the word "gay". It was co-opted and now means something completely different from what it used to. Young people hear the words of a Christmas song, "merry and gay" and they have no idea how that fits, or perhaps they giggle. Women named Gay had to change their names. Gay suddenly lost its true meaning. That is manipulation of language that I think is political in nature and has nothing to do with the *organic* growth of language. (Would you agree?)

So, essentially, I can't debate "gay marriage" since "marriage" has always been known as one thing (male/female). If we want to call it something other than "marriage", then let's do that. How about "unions" "relationships" or even a new name altogether. But marriage has already been defined for centuries (more, if you leave English for ancient language equivalents of "marriage"), and I just have a philosophical opposition to manipulation of language. I believe language must mean something.

Someone said: "All social engineering begins with language engineering" and I think that is true.

So, that is why I don't believe in "gay marriage" ... because it cannot, by definition, exist.

My friend's response was positive, and he said he liked the way this debate was going. He said he would get back to me. So far he hasn't, and it's been over six months.

(That is not the first time I have tried to have honest, friendly dialogue with a liberal, only to be met with silence after my very first question or statement. I could write a whole post on that.)

If anyone can step into his place and tell me where my logic is wrong, please do. I welcome it. I truly want to understand the liberal mindset, but I just don't get it. Why is it okay to turn language on its head to get what you want?

True story

About five years ago, I was part of a group teaching a "Back to Basics" class in our parish. The goal was to educate Catholics about the fundamentals of our faith, since so many of us received weak formation growing up.

My topic one night was contraception. I presented the biblical, historical and logical reasons for the Church's teaching against contraception, and I also touched on the issues of IVF, human cloning, embryonic stem cell research, etc.

We had a lively discussion that night, the students were engaged, and I felt very good about the whole thing. I felt even better when a woman approached me after the class. She was energized and full of compliments. She thanked me for the explanations that I gave that night, and she told me that she had known in her gut that IVF was wrong. She went on to explain that she and her beloved sister had both struggled with infertility, and that her sister had ultimately turned to IVF to conceive her children.

"I tried to convince my sister not to do it, that it was against God's law and Church teaching, but I didn't have the right words," she told me. "I am so happy that you are teaching about this! Thank you so much. People just don't know, but we need to inform them. Nobody talks about this."

In my excitement and pride, I basked in the afterglow of the "I-taught-a-good-class" high. Thank you, Lord, for using me tonight! I feel great! This woman understands the truth, and it is so good to be here together, of one mind, awestruck at the beauty of our faith!

Smiling, she continued: "Even though I also had infertility issues, my husband and I never considered IVF. We used artificial insemination to conceive our daughter. She is such a blessing! I am so grateful that we were able to conceive her in a way that didn't go against our faith."

My heart dropped. I was not prepared for that. I hadn't mentioned artificial insemination in my talk.

I had about two seconds to decide what to do. I could let it go, but that wouldn't be right. Not only would this lovely woman leave uninformed, but there were two or three students who had lingered and were listening. Or, I could tell her the truth, and then watch her happiness turn to... what? Anger? Indignation? Denial? Despair?

Quick prayer to the Holy Spirit, and then, with a softened voice and an apologetic look: "Oh.... I am so sorry to tell you this, but it is also wrong to conceive a child using artificial insemination."

In an instant, the joy went out of her face, and she became very quiet....

I stumbled on a bit about the whys of it, was as gentle as I could be, assuring her that her daughter was a precious gift and was cherished by God and the Church no matter how she was conceived. The woman was very gracious, but I could tell that her mind was now troubled and that she wanted to be somewhere else. She thanked me again and she left.

I felt horrible, but I was looking forward to seeing her at the next class and getting a chance to talk to her again (she was a regular). Turns out, she never came back. We never spoke again.

A lot of things went through my mind, but primarily I was wondering if she had left the Church. I was saddened and disappointed at the possibility, but I eventually forgot about it.

Fast forward about a year or two. I am reading our diocesan newspaper and there is a feature story about IVF and related issues, several pages long. The article profiles Catholics who had undergone IVF treatments but have since come to understand and embrace Church teaching.

One segment profiled two sisters, both of whom had suffered from infertility. One had undergone IVF, and the other had been artificially inseminated. I looked at the large, full-color picture of the two smiling sisters with their precious children, and I recognized one of them as the woman from class!

The article filled in the rest of the story for me. In the interview, the woman said that she had gone home shaken from a doctrine class after she had learned that artificial insemination was wrong. However, she loved her faith and was prepared to defer to the Church. She later discussed all she had learned with her sister, and they both continued to study the issue. Ultimately, they both came to see the truth of Church teaching, and both women went to confession. They now educate others on the truth as often as they can.

The joy that both of them exuded in both the interview and the photo was simply awesome! I was relieved and elated!

The moral of the story? You bubble-dwellers already know: Witnessing our faith to others is often uncomfortable and even cringe-worthy in this culture. Sometimes, we would prefer to crawl into a hole and die rather than speak an unpopular truth to a skeptical or hostile crowd. But if we stay silent, we will never know what good God might have brought about had we spoken. For every ten people who reject what the Church proposes, there may be one who is transformed. And there may be others who initially scoff, but who years later put the pieces together.

So, if you ever feel sick to your stomach or embarrassed to share a "hard saying" of our Catholic Faith (especially to fellow Catholics), please pray and push ahead anyway, speaking the truth in love. God is always ready to honor our feeble efforts!

PS: I am thankful that God allowed me to see the fruit that eventually came from that awkward experience. Usually we don't get such sweet consolation, but that's okay, too. One of the charisms of Mother Angelica's Poor Clares (or so I've heard) is that they are not permitted to know, until Heaven, the fruits of their prayers and offered sufferings. So even if the beneficiary of an answered prayer should write and thank them for a miracle, the superior would not let the nuns know. That blew me away when I heard it! Sacrifice with no immediate reward. That is true love.

Related posts:

IVF, and what to do with "excess" embryos
One more IVF post (blame Fr.Tad, the brainiac!)
When devout secularists and devout Catholics agree
Before you consider IVF, read this

From one controversy to the next!

Our wonderful bishop, Thomas Olmsted, has been under attack for allowing the automatic excommunication of a religious sister in our diocese. This sister ordered the abortion of a baby in a Catholic hospital, in the belief that it would save the mother's life.

Bishop Olmsted is a holy and faithful man of God, and this video helps explain the facts of what happened. (And to support the bishop, please sign the petition, here.)