Friday, May 28, 2010

Adoption

There has been a lot of talk about adoption lately on the blogs, and over the months I have truly been educated as to what adoption is and what it is not. I was always pro-adoption, but now it seems so much more personal. Not only has the blogger world been blessed with beautiful adopted babies in recent weeks and months, but my own dear IRL friend just came home from Ethiopia with her fourth adopted child, and our whole community is in love with this little boy!

It's been amazing watching all these adoptions take shape, from beginning to end.

So, when I saw this article from the Ruth Institute recently, I thought it deserved to be read far and wide. The founder of the Institute struggled with infertility for years and became an adoptive parent. Her insights here are profound, and they relate not only to adoption (and the invasive process of home studies, background checks, etc.), but she connects her experiences to the question of same-sex marriage. (Ruth Institute defends marriage as we Catholics understand it.)

Happy Memorial Day weekend to all!

11 comments:

  1. Wow that is really an interesting way to approach the topic of same sex marriage! And this statement really struck me pertaining to adoption in general: "it finally dawned on me that adoption exists to give children the parents they need, not to give adults the children they want." Of course! What a beautiful and true way to look at adoption! Sadly, I think I had the same mindset as the author before she had her epiphany! It was kind of an epiphany for me to read that too! :)

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  2. LOVED this. Thanks for sharing. Not only did I like her point of view on the homestudy process, but also about same-sex partners adoptingt. She makes perfect sense!

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  3. GIMH, I thought you might like it! :)
    Angela, that is EXACTLY the quote that made me stop in my tracks!

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  4. I too think this article is profound on so many levels... but I'm not gonna lie, I did burst into tears when I read this line: "These minimal inconveniences really do nothing more than weed out the worst and most obvious of the bad actors among prospective parents."

    I guess me and my DH are the worst prospective parents in the world.


    God, that hurts.

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  5. TCIE, I am so sorry! I never even connected your situation with that quote. I would trust any baby to your and dh's care! You particular cross just proves that the system isn't perfect and doesn't always get it just right.

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  6. This was a good post, nice to learn a little more about adoption from a different perspective. Happy Memorial Day weekend

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  7. I just wrote you a long email that I won't repeat here, but I just want your readers to know that YOU and YOUR POST did not cause me any pain, Leila! Rather it was the objective assumption made by others of people who are not approved to adopt- verbalized by the author in this article- that hit below the belt ;)

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  8. Thank you for sharing this article. It is all about the children and that is something I've come to realize with even becoming a teacher. I'm there to give the children a fighting chance at a better life..that is what adoption is too. That is something I consider when my dh and I talk about foster care. It's us giving the children something they need for however long they need it. IT's about families..though maybe not our own. Anyway...it was a good article. :)

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  9. I LOVE the Ruth Institute and Dr. J!! What a treasure she is in explaining the link between love and economics. (She does podcasts, too.) She makes an excellent point that redefining marriage will redefine parents, as we move from natural parents (i.e. biological) to "legal parents" as is already the case in Canada. So the State gets to decide who is and who is not the parent... What an incredible shift in power! Legalizing SSM undermimes the very idea that biology is the primary way we determine parentage. Adoption is an exception- but it is a child-centered exception because it provides children with the parents they need, where as SSM adoption provides parents with the children they want. There's a difference!

    Thanks for posting this article!

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  10. Great article, thanks for sharing. I'll definitely have to check out the Ru.th Inst.itute more.

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  11. Thanks for sharing this! Im really enjoying your blog.

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