tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post3439543900637080297..comments2024-03-21T04:02:46.799-07:00Comments on Little Catholic Bubble: Meet the Men Who Don't Masturbate Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-19488041747497418992016-10-09T23:23:51.232-07:002016-10-09T23:23:51.232-07:00No worries, and no, the word "orgasm" is...No worries, and no, the word "orgasm" is not a problem at all! I just didn't want to get so detailed about particular sex practices between you and your husband. It's a bit too intimate, since we are not part of your marriage. :) But generally, yes, the act would have to at least include your husband's participation in some way. <br /><br />I hope that helps! Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-86928745649232129302016-10-09T18:06:00.989-07:002016-10-09T18:06:00.989-07:00Hi Leila, Sorry if I offended! It wasn't my i...Hi Leila, Sorry if I offended! It wasn't my intent. I am new to exploring these topic. I thought since the thread was about masturbation that my question about female orgasm was within the bounds. Is the female orgasm not discussed within the Catholic faith? Or, is the word "orgasm" not acceptable in English? (I am a non-native speaker). <br /><br />I will look into this book you suggest.<br /><br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17429424748223477963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-80779854711849075722016-10-09T18:05:41.741-07:002016-10-09T18:05:41.741-07:00Hi Leila, Sorry if I offended! It wasn't my i...Hi Leila, Sorry if I offended! It wasn't my intent. I am new to exploring these topic. I thought since the thread was about masturbation that my question about female orgasm was within the bounds. Is the female orgasm not discussed within the Catholic faith? Or, is the word "orgasm" not acceptable in English? (I am a non-native speaker). <br /><br />I will look into this book you suggest.<br /><br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17429424748223477963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-89477669246169104082016-10-08T15:55:24.179-07:002016-10-08T15:55:24.179-07:00Salha, I deleted your last post, as it's getti...Salha, I deleted your last post, as it's getting too graphic. You should consult Holy Sex (the book) for answers, or the author, Dr. Popcak. I would think that your husband should be involved there somehow and you should be near to him. If that helps. Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-84948849710655952802016-10-05T20:26:16.003-07:002016-10-05T20:26:16.003-07:00This might help, too. The definition of masturbati...This might help, too. The definition of masturbation from the Catechism:<br /><br />2352 By masturbation is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. "Both the Magisterium of the Church, in the course of a constant tradition, and the moral sense of the faithful have been in no doubt and have firmly maintained that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action."138 "The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose." For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of "the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved."Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-90383607097736852302016-10-05T20:24:19.089-07:002016-10-05T20:24:19.089-07:00Salha, you have pretty free rein during the marita...Salha, you have pretty free rein during the marital act. As long as the man ejaculates within the woman's vagina (a one-flesh union), the rest of the "session" is pretty much up to you and your spouse, and how you best enjoy each other's bodies together. If you are alone doing that by yourself, separated from your spouse, that might be considered a solitary act, so I'd avoid that, but other than that, there are not a lot of "rules". Anyone else have a better answer? I hear that Holy Sex (by Popcak) has a lot of specifics on what is or is not "okay" during a lovemaking session. Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-8728497260629464972016-10-05T18:42:42.663-07:002016-10-05T18:42:42.663-07:00Serious question: If I touch, ahem, myself during ...Serious question: If I touch, ahem, myself during the marital act, is that considered masturbation? Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17429424748223477963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-62635432154999212392016-09-17T23:17:17.582-07:002016-09-17T23:17:17.582-07:00I will add this link to the Reddit page:
https://...I will add this link to the Reddit page:<br /><br />https://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/23yg85/ultimate_benefits_thread/<br /><br />Also, please forgive my lack of proofreading and typos in the first comment!<br /><br />And, lest you think I am anti-doctor or anti-science, I come from a medical family, my immediate family and my extended family. I love modern medicine!Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-65499085576829842332016-09-17T23:13:18.948-07:002016-09-17T23:13:18.948-07:00Bob, I'm glad you put in your thoughts!
I do...Bob, I'm glad you put in your thoughts! <br /><br />I don't think what you say about the urologist's recommendation follows. For example, many doctors today think it's "healthy" for a woman to kill her child in the womb, for example, or to take the Pill which actually derails natural bodily functioning and is a carcinogen according to WHO. And many doctors think that "health" includes small children learning about sexual practices and in some cases giving healthy young children powerful hormones to delay puberty, so that they can figure out what "gender" they want to be.... And doctors these days seem to believe that mutilating healthy body parts (for reasons of sterilizing the reproductive organs, or for "changing" into the opposite sex) is good medicine, etc. So, we can't just make a blanket statement that because a doctor makes a recommendation about a certain act or activity, that means it's "healthy" (and we haven't even touched upon moral). Besides, feeling pain in the groin due to not ejaculating has never killed or even maimed anyone. It's not a health issue, it's a comfort issue. I could go on, but I hope you get what I mean. <br /><br />"Something is better than nothing." I don't have that as a principle of life, so I would disagree. Why is something (even if it's immoral) be better than nothing? And why is not having sex "nothing"? I know legions of joyful, radiant priests, nuns, sisters, single people who are chaste and they have such interior peace (heck, it's not just Christian singles who have "nothing" in the way of sex, it's also Buddhist monks, yes? I don't see a lot of misery there, but I see a whole lot of misery in the hook-up/porn/sexual license culture. I have a chapter in my book that is all about masturbation. I include the secular movement on Reddit called NoFap. You should check it out, especially the Ultimate Benefits thread -- for those who give up porn and masturbation. They are shocked to find how strong and manly it renders them, and happy! Again, they are in no way religious. But it follows! We don't thrive as humans when we use things against their nature. <br /><br />Bottom line, life is not simply about avoiding suffering and seeking the next pleasure to escape the pain of this world. That is no way to live! St. Augustine said, "The heart is restless until it rests in Thee, O Lord." He was right. He was also the one who previously, famously did not want to embrace chastity! <br /><br />You sound like you are sad and lonely and that is heartbreaking, actually. I hope you find peace. I really hope you find a refuge in your Creator. God bless you!Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-61760870987944962112016-09-17T08:49:54.922-07:002016-09-17T08:49:54.922-07:00I'll throw in my two cents. One person mention...I'll throw in my two cents. One person mentioned a urologist that recommended masturbation. This looks like evidence that this anti-masturbation teaching by Catholics and other Christians is anti-science and anti-health.<br />"Waiting until marriage to experience sexual pleasure is probably the best way to experience it." Maybe it is, but that would mean some people would never experience it. Something is better than nothing.<br />"I am chaste because I know how lonely and miserable you feel when you're not chaste." I feel this way whether I am chaste or whether I am not chaste. At least masturbation is a temporary escape from these feelings.<br />"But at the end of the day, it's you and a computer, in a dark room alone; it's lonely; it's sad." Indeed it is. And it's my life even without pornography.Bob Bolondzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06048836059802737470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-72937245480644034462016-09-16T11:05:21.357-07:002016-09-16T11:05:21.357-07:00'You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall n...'You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. 30And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell."<br /> Never understood the denial of biblical evidence. Isn't Christ amazingly clear! What He describes is precisely what is happening regarding this sin whether it's in front of a computer screen or in the minds eye. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15188319685568262029noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-49558708415600786552016-09-16T08:15:51.871-07:002016-09-16T08:15:51.871-07:00PuddleDuck, I am so glad you commented! Two Protes...PuddleDuck, I am so glad you commented! Two Protestants have commented here, and it is good to hear from you. I'm so disheartened that the teaching on masturbation has changed so much, and the idea that men should masturbate (what we traditionally call "self abuse") in order to remain "pure" is just so contradictory! Young men must sense that contradiction! I have a whole chapter in my book on Masturbation, and I think it destroys any notion that such a thing could be compatible with any virtue, or with Christianity. It's just inherently "yucky" and we all know it. <br /><br />And yes, you are right about girls. God bless you for being open and vocal about this!Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-20848703314414155982016-09-16T04:34:05.137-07:002016-09-16T04:34:05.137-07:00Good post! It's so encouraging to see these br...Good post! It's so encouraging to see these brave, chaste men speaking out! I'm a Protestant, and it's very rare in the evangelical world (even among "Conservatives") for anyone to oppose the dangers of masturbation. It's accepted as okay, because the Scriptures don't condemn it explicitly. I would agree with the Catholic position that it's a form of formication and thus comes under that title, but alas, so many good Christians are blind to this truth. Many even view it as a way to mantain "purity", using the logic that if you're satisfying yourself you won't be as tempted to have sex before marriage. I admire the Catholic Church for its strong teachings against the evils of maturabation! <br />I agree with those of you who have pointed out that this is not an just an issue for men. Just because girls are wired differently doesn't mean that they are not tempted to sin in this way as well! Many girls struggle with the sin of masturbation and I feel it's important for daughters to know as well that it's okay to talk about this with mom or a trusted adult. They need to know they aren't a freak for struggling with this sin despite its usually being considered something only boys struggle with, and that God is gracious to forgive! PuddleDuckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05949867511939571870noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-40670622081689717322016-09-11T12:15:23.437-07:002016-09-11T12:15:23.437-07:00DNBA, yes! That is brilliant. So, so true.
Sunwoo...DNBA, yes! That is brilliant. So, so true.<br /><br />Sunwoo Shim.... I am happy to say that the Church definitely holds men to the same high standards of chastity as women! We are all called to be chaste and holy. It's a point I make in my book.... this "boys will be boys" crap is not a way of saying, "Oh, boys will masturbate and fornicate and look at porn, you know!" Um, NO!!!!!!!Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-11679704822895233312016-09-10T19:06:57.633-07:002016-09-10T19:06:57.633-07:00Wow! I didn't read this whole thing, but oh my...Wow! I didn't read this whole thing, but oh my life I'm so happy you aren't a hypocrite and you hold both men and women to the same sexual standards! It is so refreshing seeing something like this. Women maintaining their purity is something that is applauded, while men doing the exact same thing is heckled and ridiculed. What rubbish. I'm so happy this got posted! Men can remain chaste and wait until marriage just like women. And like Gina said women struggle with this too. People think they don't but believe me, women are tempted sexually as well. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17593706425834744030noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-43253469574994776492016-09-10T07:10:27.410-07:002016-09-10T07:10:27.410-07:00You know, Leila, in a way it's almost funny. ...You know, Leila, in a way it's almost funny. For as much as there's talk about "the rich people", most people don't expect to be rich, or even want to be. For as much talk as there is about "white privilege," most non-whites don't want to be white. And for as much talk as there is about "the politicians," most people don't want to be politicians. No, it is one of the basest most common things which seems to be one of the strongest underpinnings to bringing our culture down: uncontrolled sexual desires, which it seems everyone wants and, to justify themselves, seems to say it is RIGHT (or "a right") to want. The devil must be pleased with himself. <br /><br />"And God created man and woman and it was good," and the devil changed it into something so many people think is bad. Even at the Protestant men's Bible study yesterday morning, the guys lamented that it was a sad day when the first church said that divorce was okay. (We were in John, reflecting on: "What is truth?")<br /><br />Do Not Be Anxioushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04607616214486933423noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-40730929800522215202016-09-09T08:22:56.788-07:002016-09-09T08:22:56.788-07:00Gina, excellent points! Thank you! There was a spe...Gina, excellent points! Thank you! There was a speaker at our recent women's conference who spoke of her struggles with masturbation early in her marriage, and I thought that was so brave of her to discuss it!Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-70043525016557825142016-09-09T08:06:49.905-07:002016-09-09T08:06:49.905-07:00I'm now a 24 year old happily married woman --...I'm now a 24 year old happily married woman -- I struggled with masturbation as a teenager. We don't talk about this too much because girls are not "supposed" to have this problem, but so many of us do! <br /><br />My one advice is, don't trust your self control to work in very tempting situations, but change the situation! If you're tempted to masturbate, go somewhere it's impossible! Go to the living room if you're in your own room, go take a walk if you live alone. Skip that shower if you need to. I don't often endorse skipping showers but its sure better to be physically dirty than to sin! This also works with pre marital sexuality. If you and your fiance are never behind closed doors together, you won't do inappropriate things.Ginahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18352200402938057332noreply@blogger.com