tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post4806485705586409039..comments2024-03-21T04:02:46.799-07:00Comments on Little Catholic Bubble: Part Three: Trying to re-emerge Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-74279346346560854272015-10-21T21:07:01.483-07:002015-10-21T21:07:01.483-07:00Meaning, within a week of when my panic attack sto...Meaning, within a week of when my panic attack stopped, I had my first CBT session. My anxiety was much lessened by then, but still had to come down a little more to be back to normal.Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-46309709190643810522015-10-21T21:06:03.992-07:002015-10-21T21:06:03.992-07:00Lena, great question! I had those two sessions aft...Lena, great question! I had those two sessions after the major panic stopped (within the week), and I had already identified what my cognitive issues were. It was helpful to know, but the most important thing for me was (in my evaluation) the insight that God gave me that nothing was out of His control, nothing was to be feared, and I need only trust. Once the grace of that understanding came in, it changed everything. I go into that in Part Four, so I hope you will read that! :)Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-26650810180411343682015-10-21T20:00:29.615-07:002015-10-21T20:00:29.615-07:00Do you mean you only had two weeks of panic?? I am...Do you mean you only had two weeks of panic?? I am sure they were a miserable two weeks that probably felt longer. Are you saying it only took two sessions of cognitive behavior therapy to change your thinking patterns?<br />Can I say I am jealous that you got better in such a short amount of time? For some of us it can take years or decades of treatment and prayers to get partly better. <br /><br />Lenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09173616693453942166noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-50774371878817323382015-10-10T20:10:28.076-07:002015-10-10T20:10:28.076-07:00Yikes, the typos! Typing fast, sorry!!Yikes, the typos! Typing fast, sorry!!Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-12171173722507298782015-10-10T20:10:01.313-07:002015-10-10T20:10:01.313-07:00Maria, it sounds like you have had a lovely epipha...Maria, it sounds like you have had a lovely epiphany! And what a beautiful testimony your life is for those all around you! I have always admired your faith, and your steadfast love and concern for mothers and their children, as well as you complete devotion to the Rosary! God must be so please! You love very well. :)<br /><br />And, I wish I could remember more of Michelle's prayer routine (I barely remember conversation details from that time), but I do know that she did some of the liturgy of the hours and also did lots of Scripture reading. At the time of her death, I believe she was reading a book about St. Joseph, whom she loved, called <i>Not Your Ordinary Joe</i>, as well as that little blue "Mary Day By Day" prayer book that she used every day, and it's the same prayer book that my daughter put on my bedside when she left that morning for Nebraska. My daughter had remembered that I mentioned that particular prayer book recommended by Michelle and she got it for me and inscribed it with beautiful words. <br /><br />There were some wonderful prayers and thoughts and experiences in Michelle's private journal (and artwork) and someday I hope to share some of that with you...Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-62810701815173805682015-10-10T20:05:09.004-07:002015-10-10T20:05:09.004-07:00Thank you, Maggie! I hope I capture enough of it f...Thank you, Maggie! I hope I capture enough of it for everyone who needs it. I figure if there are more questions, we can do that in the comments!Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-7610719726832481232015-10-10T18:05:16.088-07:002015-10-10T18:05:16.088-07:00Hence, the axiom, less is more, is NOT applicable ...Hence, the axiom, less is more, is NOT applicable here! What may seem insignificant to you may resonate with a reader. It takes a humble heart to share all of this, and we appreciate your candidness. May the Holy Spirit<br />continue to guide your keystrokes!Maggiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16673084423694888503noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-56754416840082666622015-10-10T17:57:19.512-07:002015-10-10T17:57:19.512-07:00Now, several years later I've kind of accepted...Now, several years later I've kind of accepted it all. Still though, I kept wondering - what is my purpose here on earth? Since I can't be a Mother, what is it that God and the Blessed Mother want me to do??? I still have my days though when I see news someone is pregnant and might get sad for a moment wishing it was me, but I am really happy for these ladies esp. that they choose life for their precious unborn babies. What really helps me is praying for these ladies and their babies. I also pray for the end of abortion. I would say that praying for the end of abortion, for all women and men to choose life, and for women who are pregnant and their babies are my #1 favorite prayer intention.<br /><br />Today at the 2nd day of the Third Order Franciscan Retreat, we were blessed to hear several conferences about St. Kolbe and his writings about Our Lady and being consecrated to her. God's will and the importance of accepting God's will was talked about quite a bit too. At break time, I opened up my bag to read my new Rosary edition book for the family. On the page of the first joyful mystery the mediation mentioned those of us who are married who can't conceive. It said we have "spiritual offspring". That set off a spark for me and I ran to show this passage to a lovely older lady who has been in this Third Order for many, many years. She read it and told me it means I can pray for all the babies in danger of being aborted and spiritually adopt them. Really?! Oh! I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to pray for them and spiritually adopt them! Yes! Wish I could really adopt them all, but since I can't I will gladly pray for them all!" So I'm thinking now, maybe I've found one of my purposes -God's will for me? Yes? Oh, I hope so! This makes me so very very HAPPY! I want to do everything I can to end the horror of abortion and save babies from being aborted and help Moms and Dad's say yes to life!<br /><br />Love,<br />Maria XOXOMaria Theresehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11383883031468303487noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-7041554922113723262015-10-10T17:56:18.955-07:002015-10-10T17:56:18.955-07:00Oh, by the way Leila, when I found out I had endo...Oh, by the way Leila, when I found out I had endometriosis and couldn't have children, I was so devastated. Then I was angry especially after a friend of mine and I prayed a novena to be able to conceive. Soon after finishing the novena, my friend (married less then a year and she just turned 40) found out she was pregnant. When I discovered the news on Facebook, I burst into tears and cried and cried. When my friend called me to tell me the news, I couldn't even come to the phone. I still feel bad about that. That happened four years ago.<br /><br />I kept wondering, why did God answer her prayer with a positive result and not mine? I couldn't understand. Then someone I worked with who had endometriosis got pregnant, but ended up having an abortion (I tried to intercede and offer to adopt the baby. This is the third timet when I've encountered a young lady about to have an abortion. The first time, sadly I was so shy and didn't have courage and didn't say anything. The second and third time I somehow got my courage up and offered to adopt the babies..). A few months later she got pregnant again and kept this baby. When I found out God sent her another baby, I burst into tears again. I couldn't understand again - why her and not me? What did I do that was so wrong? <br /><br />After that every time I hear someone was pregnant, I cried. When I read an article in the news online about couples choosing to selective abort multiples, I cried and again asked God why? Why couldn't He send me one of these unwanted babies? Why couldn't I be a Mama too? I just didn't understand. I slacked off on my prayer life during this time too. I still went to Mass, received Communion, and Confession (I cried to all the Franciscan Friars during Confession with them and one very kind Friar told me that prehaps God wanted to send me another special grace. Um, what kind of special grace did He want to send me? Still trying to figure that one out!) but I kind of slacked off praying the rosary every day. I didn't pray any more of my favorite 54 day rosary novenas after praying it with the friend who was able to get pregnant.<br /><br />Maria Theresehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11383883031468303487noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-84776079372167847912015-10-10T17:26:22.734-07:002015-10-10T17:26:22.734-07:00Oh my goodness - what a story! You have me on edge...Oh my goodness - what a story! You have me on edge, Leila!<br />I am so sorry you had to go through all that, but it sounds like it made you an even better Catholic, Wife, Mom, Daughter, and Friend - right? And your story can help and encourage others! Your story (and Michelle's) has already encouraged and inspired me so much already! At my Third Order Franciscan Retreat this weekend, I kept thinking of you, your family, Michelle, and her three daughters. I offered up the Mass and my Communion for all of you.<br /><br />I can't wait to hear Part 4! I'd also love to hear more about Michelle, her prayer practices and advice as someone else requested here - I second that request, please! By the way, I found Michelle's favorite prayer book in the Franciscan Friar's book store and bought a copy! See? Your dear Cousin and Friend and you are helping so many of us love the faith more, increase our faith, and want to do do everything we can to reach Heaven someday! Thank you so much, Leila and you too Michelle up in Heaven! <br /><br />Love you Leila and your blog! Please keep writing and encouraging us! <br /><br />Love,<br />Maria XOXOMaria Theresehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11383883031468303487noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-48610790585661167052015-10-10T14:16:28.986-07:002015-10-10T14:16:28.986-07:00Can't wait to read the rest! God is good.Can't wait to read the rest! God is good.Connie Rossinihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16167873116105163091noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-16889436426648354792015-10-10T13:47:00.929-07:002015-10-10T13:47:00.929-07:00Thank you guys so much! Working on Part Four now! ...Thank you guys so much! Working on Part Four now! It's so hard to know what to include, as there is so much to say....Leila@LittleCatholicBubblehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09357573787143230160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-55658674109843200022015-10-10T05:27:20.383-07:002015-10-10T05:27:20.383-07:00Just one more thought--this is such a powerful tes...Just one more thought--this is such a powerful testimony to the Eucharist: "When the Host was consecrated and became the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Christ, my body started to awaken -- I actually heard my stomach growl! I could not believe it, and I was flooded with hope. " Again, your situation reminds me of St.Therese's illness. I can't wait until part 4! Beckyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10451590537173713861noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-54761680444940452212015-10-09T08:20:01.405-07:002015-10-09T08:20:01.405-07:00Wow!! That is all I can say, just wow!Wow!! That is all I can say, just wow!Beckyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10451590537173713861noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-62061540687751268632015-10-09T08:03:54.645-07:002015-10-09T08:03:54.645-07:00Thank you so much for your openness in all of this...Thank you so much for your openness in all of this. Each of us needs to be seen in our darkness and to learn from others who have passed through times like this.<br /><br />I do hope you will share Michelle's prayer practices and advice too!Jennihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02281799882856474977noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-70607812482035280372015-10-08T21:17:06.337-07:002015-10-08T21:17:06.337-07:00Leila,
Thank you for sharing your heart with us!...Leila, <br /><br />Thank you for sharing your heart with us! The part of your story where you experienced the consecration and communion and your body was awakened reminded me of the words we say at this point in the Mass, "Lord I am not worthy to receive you, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed." It sounds like God healed you and listened to your cries for help. This gives me great hope for my own journey. Thank you and God bless! asliceofsmithlifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01411785385543404159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-240447238522390484.post-66046107848443541932015-10-08T19:54:17.559-07:002015-10-08T19:54:17.559-07:00Thank you again for sharing this with us. So much...Thank you again for sharing this with us. So much, thank you.JULIEhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08906015288812759339noreply@blogger.com